Feb 152012

There’s a lot of stuff covered on the Apple beat daily, usually by multiple blogs. Because I tend to dwell on one topic and post infrequently, I’m going to try something a little different: taking some of the headlines from my RSS feed and commenting on their gist. The news items are plucked somewhat randomly, as 12 other blogs usually post something on the same issue within 20 minutes of each other. Some other pieces are thrown in for “color”. I’m hoping this is a way for me to add a small amount of original commentary on topics I’d either never get to or before they are processed to death by the technorati blogging machine. Comments/suggestions are always welcome.

RantSS for 2-15-12

Your iPhone’s Privacy Sucks Because of Apple—and Even Steve Jobs Agrees – Jizzmodo

We’re taking the address book permission issue and blaming it on Apple, because Google Analytics tells us that baiting people in possession of common sense accounts for 93% of our traffic. We even found a video of the brilliant dead guy who ran the company being quoted on a somewhat similar issue out of context.

Did Samsung just reveal a Galaxy Note 10.1 for MWC? – The Verge

Samsung makes a 5.3″ Galaxy Note, which is a giant phone with a stylus; they also make a 10.1″ (7″ and 8.9″) Galaxy Tab, which are tablets. The “10.1” Galaxy Note” is either a PR screw-up created by the confusion inherent in maintaining a product line consisting of a bajillion undifferentiated knock-offs or of jamming a phone into a 10″ tablet is sheer deperation. Both possibilities are even money.

How Realistic Would a Robot Have to Be for You to Have Sex with It? – Jizzmodo

Read about the trending topic at all the Jizzmodo IRL meet-ups.

Apps uploading address books is a privacy side-show compared to DPI – TechCrunch

Deep Packet Inspection is a lot more intrusive than what Path did. Here’s a bunch of companies that do it now! Did we mention that more than 50 other apps do what Path did? Have we covered how Apple’s address book permission policies allow Path and others to do these things? Did we mention that TechCrunch enjoys 100% editorial independence from potential influencers like CrunchFund?

Video: Photoshop CS6 Content-Aware Move, Extend Makes Us Drool – Mac|Life

Here’s one feature that you can use to justify spending $600 on a program that’s now 90% feature redundant with programs costing 5% as much. Remember to fasten your bib prior to buffering.

News: Realmac Software releases Clear – iLounge

Absolutely every other tech site has reported on this app and I’m stumped as to why this is. It’s maybe the 12th most useful and 3rd prettiest app in the most crowded category of the App Store, but I predict it will be upheld as an example of app excellence because you can pinch, spread and pull to manipulate the UI. For this reason it will also be a deserved object of competing platforms’ ridicule.

FLA head describes Foxconn plants as ‘way above average’ – MacNN

/cue Change.org response about 1. the FLA being paid plants with no objectivity, 2. use of the term “average” and a warning to guilty westerners that “average” in Chinese means life-threatening and/or soul-sucking. 3. Apple having too much money, gotten through arbitrary means and compounded at an interest rate derived from the value of the souls and backs of cheap, exploited labor.

Congress Wants Answers From Apple On Apps Stealing Address Book Contacts – Cult of Mac

Dear Mr. Cook:

I really don’t have a clue about technology, but I do know that your company receives the vast majority of technology coverage in the media today, which means my political future could stand to benefit from your answering my questions relating to an ongoing issue that has only recently been getting media attention. Apple has a track record of answering inquiries issues from elected officials, so I have a better than average chance of being able to parley this letter into some future favor among this country’s younger voters.

I’ve cut and pasted something taken from various blogs across the intertubes that I think frames my inquiry, and juxtaposed it against an excerpt from your own developer guidelines in a way that I think makes it look like something important. The following is a list of questions, most of which overlap each other, that I will have a young person on my staff, Felipe Mendoza, to translate the answers to in “elected official speak” for me. I’ve added a respond-by date, because I want it to look like I mean business.


Some generic politician

Some trumped-up title

Some subcommittee that does nothing

Apple: iOS update to require user permission for apps to access contacts – Macworld

Last call for all editorializing about Apple’s contacts permission policy, 7 day extension granted to all blogs who want to bitch about how it should have been done sooner.

To Read, Or Not To Read – parislemon


Feb 152012

Proview Shenzen is a company that is financially one clockwise revolution away from the sewer pipe. Its only asset is a name, a name for which Apple has a licensing agreement with the company in 10 different countries, including one with China under a Taiwanese affiliate. Proview claims that the agreement is not valid, and at least for now some judge in China agrees. Proview is lobbying the Chinese government for Apple to either pay them off or use the infringement on their trademark to not only block the flow of iPads into China, but also block their export from the assembly facilities that Apple (and no one else) so famously utilizes in-country. Proview’s claims have allegedly prompted Apple to pull the iPad from some Chinese retailers, such as Amazon (this is according to a spokesperson from Amazon, a company that in no way competes with Apple and would totally not have a reason to pull it off their site prior to Apple asking). For something that I guarantee will turn out to be a non-issue, variations of this story have been popping up in blogs everywhere for the last month. But that’s the core truth of what constitutes 99.9% of Apple “news”: bullshit that is guaranteed to blow over repackaged in semi-titillating headlines. Let me give you a sense of what’s going on in China regarding Proview, ripped from the pages of my latest screenplay titled “Make Linkbait Hay While the Media Sun Shines, You No-Value-Added Little Bitches” (it’s a working title):

(phone rings)

Chinese government: “Hello, Chinese government”

Tim Cook: “China? Oh, I’m sorry, I thought this was Brazil”

CG: “No, China here. Who is this?”

TC: “It’s Tim Cook over at Apple. Listen, I’m sorry, I meant to call Brazil. I’ve got a shitload of business to discuss with them…”

CG: “Business?”

TC: “Yea, boring stuff, really. I guess they don’t have as many bankrupt assclowns wanting to fuck with our supply chain or cash in on moo shu wrapper-thin IP. That reminds me – I have to catch up with you later to talk about demobilization phasing. Anyway, gotta go!”



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